It’s hard for me to write about Jody Couch. And I’m so glad grateful that I was recently able to find her daughter Rita Fay and hear her story. In 1981 my partner Roberta and I drove from Taos, New Mexico, to Hyden, Kentucky, so she could become a nurse midwife at Frontier Nursing School. I was thirty-one. The program was very difficult. We were in the heart of Appalachia with all its challenges, and it was dangerous for lesbians. It was hard on us individually and as a couple. I met Jody through Erica and Anna Lise, another lesbian couple who ran a clinic. I was drawn to her tough spirit, her colorful personality, and her five kids. We became close. I admired her courage as she dealt with poverty, homophobia, and raising her kids alone. I thought they were a happy family, and I enjoyed hanging out with them. While Jody was working the night shift at the hospital, the 16-year-old who lived downstairs was having sex with her 12-year-old daughter Rita Faye. When she got pregnant, I arranged for an abortion for her and drove them to Lexington. I thought I was being a feminist hero, but I know now that Rita experienced the abortion as a rape. When I heard the rest of the family story during this project, I was appalled and saddened. I had no idea what the kids were experiencing. I was young and naïve. I wish I had understood more and been able to make a difference for them somehow. Getting to know Rita again has been amazing. Her resilience, faith, and healing are an honor to witness. I feel that she has taken the best of Jody and gone further with it than was possible for her mom. That's how we all heal intergenerational trauma.  And from my perspective, that's a happy ending.

In this interview Rita tells her mother Jody’s story and her own with honesty, humor, and compassion. She describes Jody’s early deprivation, how she found love, her abandonment of her kids for her girlfriend, and her death. Rita’s own story is one of neglect, sexual abuse, forgiveness, and personal triumph. I am honored to record and share it with you.

Letters from Rita C. and Jody C. to Nancy Lee, 1983, along with a 1983 family photograph.